Is it OK to ask guests to bring expensive wine to a party?

Ask Dr Vinny

Hello there! I'm Dr. Vinifera, but you can call me Vinny. Ask me your toughest wine questions, from the fine points of etiquette to the science of winemaking. And don't worry, I'm no wine snob—you can also ask me those "dumb questions" you're too embarrased to ask your wine geek friends! I hope you find my answers educational, empowering and even amusing. And don't forget to check out my most asked questions and my full archives for all my Q&A classics.

Dear Dr. Vinny,

A colleague invited us to their home for a barbecue, and they asked us to bring a specific bottle of wine—one that cost more than $100. I thought this was rude and out of line! What do you think?

—Debbie, U.S.

Dear Debbie,

You're not wrong: This sounds rude, and also bizarre. I would never ask anyone to bring a specific wine, let alone something with that price tag. It's even stranger to request such an expensive bottle of wine for a barbecue!

Here’s what I’d do: I’d take their suggestion as a starting point. I’d pick wines I’m comfortable with, or have a connection with or a story about that are in the same vein. I’d show up all smiles and tell them that they have great taste in wine, and they inspired you to pick out the wines you’ve brought. Splurging and giving them what they requested sets a costly precedent.

—Dr. Vinny

Ask Dr. Vinny

More In Dr. Vinny

Which wines go best with Vietnamese cuisine?

Wine Spectator's expert Dr. Vinny explains how to pair wine with Asian flavors.

Jul 22, 2019

What do people mean by traditional vs. modern wine styles?

Wine Spectator's expert Dr. Vinny explains modern vs. traditional wine styles around the …

Jul 19, 2019

Which wines have the least sugar?

Wine Spectator's expert Dr. Vinny explains that determining the amount of sugar in a wine …

Jul 17, 2019

What does “cloying” mean in reference to wine?

Wine Spectator's expert Dr. Vinny explains what happens when sweetness goes too far.

Jul 15, 2019

How should I decant a double-magnum of a 20-year-old wine?

Wine Spectator's expert Dr. Vinny offers tips on decanting large-format wine bottles.

Jul 12, 2019

Are there different strategies to preserving leftover still vs. sparkling wine?

Wine Spectator's expert Dr. Vinny explains the science behind keeping still and sparkling …

Jul 10, 2019
WineRatings+

WineRatings+

Xvalues

Xvalues

Restaurant Search

Restaurant Search